


Stronger Than Fear

by Reibunriinta



Category: Magi: The Labyrinth of Magic, Sinbad no Bouken - Fandom
Genre: Blood and Violence, Canon Divergence, Dark Humor, F/M, Self Harm, Slavery, denial fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2017-10-18
Packaged: 2018-12-05 06:29:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11572317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reibunriinta/pseuds/Reibunriinta
Summary: Kil never planned to survive the rebellion, never wanted to be free. Now, working at the Sindria trading company, she must adjust to her new life and learn the meanings of friendship, confidence, and family.





	1. A Close Call

This wasn’t supposed to happen, and honestly Kil was so angry she could hardly speak. 

 

Out of all the things that she had planned to day, being stabbed by a small child was in fact one of them, living to tell the tale however was not. 

 

She’d stirred right about when they placed her atop a fire, and she must have scared everyone when she screamed and rolled to the ground.  Ignoring the cries from the children, and screams that she had come back from the dead to kill them all at Maader’s command, she struggled to her knees and cried out. 

 

“D..does anyone have a bandage...p..please!” The edge in her voice revealed how much pain she was in, in fact while this wasn’t the most pain she had ever been, or the closest she’d ever been to death, she still could hardly breathe. 

 

“We need bandages now!” When everyone rushed to accommodate her she blinked in surprise, but figured the kids were too scared to question it. 

 

She grew more confused however when Sinbad rushed to he side. “Kil...you’re alive!” 

 

Coughing slightly, she groaned and let herself fall into his arms. Having only talked to Sinbad a few times, this was awkward at best, but when one was slowly dying from multiple stab wounds they didn’t have much of a choice than to accept a little help from anyone willing. 

 

“Yeah. Lucky me.” She muttered. “By the way Sinbad….when I’m better we’re going to have a talk about...planning for things….like rebellions….and how to reduce death rates significantly because….” she averted her gaze to the fire. “That’s just embarrassing.” 

 

Sinbad scowled and looked like he was going to retort when the other boy, the one who had resulted in the loss of the Mariadel company along with that giant hag, showed up with a safety aid kit. “You’re going to need medical attention asap but….for now this will have to do.” He said casually as he bandaged the wound and did his best to stop the bleeding. 

 

“Thank you.” She croaked. “I may not look it but...I’ve had worse wounds than this...I’ll survive it unfortunately.” 

 

He nodded, and seemed not the least bit grossed out by the blood that had gotten on his hands and shirt which was nice. This kid surely was a mystery, and she didn’t want to know why he seemed so casual in the face of death. However, she knew this much; if someone could look death in the eyes and smile they knew the truth that death was the greatest mercy. That they’d lived in a hell comparable to her own, and they knew. They knew that death was a gift in which they were undeserving. 

 

“I figured you might have...you’re pretty resilient…” 

“Thanks.” Kil didn’t hear many compliments come her way, though resilient was one she had received more than once. She had suffered more physical, emotional, and mental abuse than what should have been physically possible and yet here she was. Still breathing. 

 

“Um...you two seem a little too casual about this…” Sinbad noted with concern, his eyes darting back and forth between the both of them. 

 

“Freaking out is bad for my complexion.” Kil managed to shoot back weakly. The truth was she shouldn’t be talking or straining herself, but it she was going to survive this she was going to do it while annoying the hell out of those responsible, even if they were now helping her. She still assumed they were enemies, and even if they were not, she still was petty. 

 

“I’d be more worried about the stab wounds myself but...it’s good to see you have priorities.” 

 

“Ja’far….” Sinbad scolded. 

 

Kil managed a chuckle. “What have I if I lose my stunning good looks?” 

 

Sinbad frowned then. “Did you just…make a joke?”   
  
Sighing, although painfully, Kil managed to look up at him. “Sinbad...do you really think….I could have survived all this time…without a sense of humor?” 

 

He thought for a moment. “....Yes....” 

 

She scoffed. Truthfully, she felt numb and the pain was currently interrupting her anguish. After all, it was hard to think of much else when an ungodly amount of pain wracked her small tattered frame and her head felt too light from the blood she’d lost. She was likely dying still, and for all she knew she could die before receiving the medical attention needed, so she was determined to do so in a good mood and giving these fools no satisfaction of seeing her misery. 

 

“Alright we’re going to lift you up...as gently as possible but...this is going to hurt a lot….” Ja’far warned and then at the count of three the two of them scooped her up. 

 

“This isn’t so ba-” before she could finish the sentence the pain hit her and she blacked out, her last thoughts the wish that she would die then and be thrown back into the fire where she belonged although...something told her there would be no such thing. 


	2. Wake Up Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kil awakes in the middle of the Sindria trading company's infirmary and comes to terms with the reality of her new ownership.

“It’s been weeks now and she’s not waking up…”   
  
“Is she...is she still alive?”   
  
“Well she’s still breathing...At this rate though it’s hard to know if she’ll ever wake up….”  
  
When Kil heard voices, not able to discern them exactly just yet, she groaned and curled into a ball.   
  
“Wait...I think she’s waking up...Kil! Can you hear me?”   
  
Kil opened her mouth to speak but couldn’t get her voice to work properly, instead making a rasping noise that sounded less like a woman talking and more like a duck that had just been shot out of a tree.   
  
Opening her eyes, she blinked and let them adjust before she thought she saw Sinbad standing over her. At least she thought it was him, except he looked worried.   
  
“Kil...if you can understand me do something…”   
  
Taking a pained breath she balled her fist and swung her arm upwards managing to catch him in the jaw. Pain wracking her body from the effort, she and Sinbad cried out at the same time and he took a step back, gazing down at her in confusion. “What was that for?!”   
  
Smirking then she pointed to her mouth and shrugged.   
  
“Can you not talk?” He asked, looking worried again which confused her more than anything.   
  
“I...I…” Taking a deep breath, she tried again. “I can try.”   
  
Her voice was cracked, strained, and weak, and she had the physical energy was an infant or so it seemed, but she was alive and that was something at least. Once again her survival instinct kicked in and she seized upon her fragile will to live despite having no real reason to.   
  
“Alright...you’re okay.” He sighed in relief before sitting down next to her bed. “You blacked out after we took you to the boat...remember?”   
  
She shook her head weakly. “I just...remember...that you saved me...why?”   
  
The look of sadness in his eyes was unmistakable, but hard to place as sympathy. “Well...why not?”   
  
Kil just stared at him a moment incredulously. “Do you want that in alphabetical order or chronologically?”   
  
Sinbad just sighed. “It was a rhetorical question...Kil, I saved you because it was the right thing to do and because I refuse to let anyone else die because of what I did…”  
  
She stared a long minute, wondering what he meant that it was the right thing. How was it the right thing? She was a scoundrel through and through, she had gotten so many people hurt and killed by virtue of her position, and she was just as guilty as her mistress. Why then...would anyone save her, a pitiful slave that hurt her own kind?   
  
“The right thing? I’m a slave trader…” She muttered darkly.   
  
Sinbad met her gaze. “Maybe so...but you’re also a slave.”   
  
Thinking a minute, Kil nodded. So that was it? They wanted her to work at the company? She supposed it made sense. Unlike the children, she was an irreplaceable asset to the Mariadel Company, and naturally when all the company’s assets were given to the Sindria trading company, they would want to put her to work for them. So in other words, she had no choice but to serve her former enemies, and now she was entirely at Sindbad’s mercy. What revenge and grueling torture must he be planning?   
  
Reminding of something then, she reached up and touched her neck, eyes widening. “Where’s my collar?” She asked numbly. She could feel the scarring on her neck, after all the other chain scars were mostly faded, but she had worn the collar consistently for the better part of her eleven years spent in slavery.   
  
Sinbad frowned then, averting his gaze. “We got rid of it...you don’t need it right? If you want to cover the scar up though...we can get you like a scarf or something…”   
  
Kil blinked in confusion; why wouldn’t she wear her collar? Wasn’t she still a slave?   
  
“Um...sure okay…..” she drew in a painful breath then. “How much time do I have?”   
  
He blinked. “For what?”   
  
“For recovery…”   
  
She was met with a look of pure confusion as Sinbad fiddled with his hair absently, an anxious habit she’d noticed about him from his time at the Mariadel company.   
  
“You can take...all the time that you need.”   
  
Confusion filling her then, she nodded uncertainly. “Thank you...I guess just...tell me when I’m to start working…”   
  
“Working?” Sinbad repeated in confusion.   
  
Kil’s eyebrows furrowed. “Well I’m not here for my health am I?”   
  
“This is an infirmary…”   
  
“Uhuh…” she nodded impatiently.   
  
He nodded back in confusion. “Uhuh….”   
  
“Um...I guess I should rest then yeah? So I can get my energy back quickly...”  
  
Sinbad nodded. “Uh yeah...you should...I’ll leave you in peace now but...we’ll come back to check on you later…”  
  
She stared a moment. “So...we’re in agreement then?”   
  
Nodding, though still confused seeming, Sinbad nodded. “Well...bye I guess.” He said softly, waving a bit awkwardly, before leaving the room.   
  
Taking a deep breath to enjoy the silence then, Kil curled back up in her blanket and drifted off to sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have another chapter because the denial is strong in me. asdfgh. Thanks for reading this awkward mess of a fic. Im lov you. <3


	3. Dreams and agendas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kil wakes from a nightmare to see Rurumu and grows suspicious that the others are trying to kill her.

Everything was dark as Kil tried to calm herself. The scent of blood lingered despite how extensively she had washed herself and the crime scene, it haunted her as much as the feeling of it had against her skin. 

She finally managed to light the candle she had meant to; she’d had to try a few times as her hands were trembling violently. Once the dim light filled the room she sighed with relief and then looked around to be sure she was alone, hoping Maader was still in the kitchen with a glass of wine celebrating their victory.

Maader’s victory however, was Kil’s downfall it seemed. 

Hot tears filling her eyes, she bowed her head, praying to whatever silent deities that must be watching. Kil didn't know much about religion, but she knew if there was a god, there would be no forgiving. Her sins were too great. All this and she was barely ten years old. 

“I’m sorry.” She whispered, crying into her hands as the grief caught up with her. “I’m so so sorry”

“I don't want an apology.”

She squeaked when she heard Maader speak from the doorway. Not daring to turn and look at her mistress, she stayed in the corner of the room, holding the candle close for security. “Y...yes lady Maader.” She squeaked. “S..sorry.” 

Sighing, the woman strode confidently up to her. Crouching then, she rested a firm hand on Kil’s shoulder. “You hesitated...do you not trust me or were you that weak?” 

Noticing her mocking tone, Kil averted her gaze anxiously. “A...are you going to punish me?” 

Her eyes flashed to the whip at Maader’s belt anxiously and her hands began to tremble, but she looked up again instantly. 

“Normally yes.” Maader answered. “Disobedience is inexcusable however, he’s dead now and I'm in too good a mood.” 

Swallowing the lump in her throat, Kil’s whole frame began to shake. That's right. He was dead now. There would be no redemption, no freedom, for her and if they were found out she would surely be executed. 

“Oh Kil…” sighing softly, Maader pulled the younger child into an embrace, holding her tightly. 

Kil knew better to shy away so she went limp. She was so conflicted and terrified in that moment. She wanted to trust Maader, but how could she? How could she trust the woman who had turned her into the killer she now existed as. 

She should have driven the knife through her own heart, not his. How pitiful that she had taken another life out of fear, or perhaps it really had been out of loyalty. 

…

When Kil awoke to someone nudging her, she peeled her eyes open slowly. 

When she saw Rurumu standing over her, she tensed immediately and tried to sit up only to cry out in pain. 

“Ah! Take it easy!” Rurumu commanded gently. “You were…you were crying in your sleep...are you alright.” 

Kil glared a moment. If this hag thought she would fall for her gentle facade like Maader did, then she was far more pathetic than she'd expected.   
“I’m fine...lady Rurumu.” She exclaimed sharply. 

Rurumu frowned. “You're sweating pretty badly...did you have a nightmare.” 

“My life is a nightmare ma’am.” She said coldly. “Was there something you wanted from me?” 

“Nono you're fine dear...I was just coming to check on you. Are you hungry at all? You missed dinner…” 

So that's why she came? To administer poison in the middle of the night while Kil was still immobile and half asleep? How cruel. 

Kil shook her head. “No I’m fine ma’am, sorry.” 

Rurumu stared a moment searchingly before she nodded. “Alright...but if you need anything ring for one of us...we want to take care of you.” 

Kil’s eyes momentarily settled on the bell pull and she stifled a laugh. Like hell would she be calling attention to herself like that, especially considering they were likely just itching to find and excuse to punish her and trying to poison her. 

“Yes lady Rurumu...thank you.” She hoped her tone wasn't too cold, as she could surely be punished for that as well, but she was half asleep and bitter. Though honestly in her position who wouldn't be? 

“You're welcome Kil...rest well” Rurumu whispered softly in parting before taking her leave. 

Alone then, Kil sighed and stared up at the ceiling. Still depressed from the dream, or rather a memory, she would find it hard to get back to sleep.   
She didn't want to close her eyes again, afraid someone else might sneak up on her, so she held her blanket tight and took a deep breath to steel herself. 

If they wanted her dead would she let them have her without a fight? Where was her bravery? 

Sighing, Kil noted that she'd lost such a thing a good ten years before then, but that was irrelevant to the point at hand. She had to be more cautious if she wanted to survive in this new environment, starting with less sleep and more observation. 

Once she knew their secrets one of two things could happen, they'd kill her, however that thought was nothing new, or they would keep her close and secure her loyalty. By setting herself up as an obstacle would do little good, but she'd long since learned that people were like prizes. If she could make herself a prize to be won, or an object to have and own, then she was sure of it. 

Everything would be okay.


	4. Escape

“You wanted to see me?” Ja’far asked curiously as he gazed up at Rurumu. 

 

His mother nodded, her lips pursed tightly in one of the frowns she always got when she was troubled. Ja'far was a tad worried, but considering all that had happened he figured she would be rather troubled, as they all would be. 

 

“Yes, thank you. I’m worried about Kil...she's been awake for days now...but she's not eating...every time we try to get her to eat she finds a way out of it...and then she's stopped sleeping...she's always alert when we come in to check on her...it's very concerning.”

 

Ja'far frowned a bit, pondering. “hmm…that is troublesome…do you think sicker than we thought?” 

 

Rurumu shook her head. “No...that's not quite it. I think...well after all we did she must feel threatened by us. And it's just...well...she kind of reminds me of how you were after first joining us in Imuchakk so…” 

 

“You want me to go talk some sense into her.” He finished, realizing that sounded more threatening than he’d meant it. “That is...to let her know that she's safe here.” 

 

Rurumu nodded. “Yes...I think...I think if anyone understands her it'll be you.” 

Ja'far nodded. “Alright, I’ll go speak to her. Oh also Rika says Kikiriku has been pinching the twins so we've separated them...you might want to check on them.” 

 

“Oh dear…” sighing tiredly, she stood and followed him from the room. “Well that will need to be dealt with...can't have animosity between siblings.” 

 

Smiling, Ja'far nodded and made his way the infirmary. 

 

In all honesty Ja'far was in a pleasant mood despite everything that had happened just weeks before. Sinbad was home, the children had been taken back to their families, and the remaining children were now safe and in relative good spirits under their care at the Sindria trading company. 

 

Now that the crisis was over, he was able to spend more time with Pipirika and his siblings, something that he had come to cherish since Kikiriku’s birth. He never would have believed it, but he liked having siblings. He liked the way Kikiriku looked up to him, the way the twins already had taken to him. Sure, they at times could be annoying and no family was without it’s flaws but it was just that: a family. 

 

The whole thing was so normal. Normal was a strange thing in Ja'far’s life, it was exciting. More so than any grand moment or adventure, he simply liked the peace that came from family. 

 

Shaking away these musings, he stepped gently into the infirmary only to frown. 

 

Kil was awake as expected, however she was trying to climb out the window.

 

Ja’far sighed. “You don't have to do that.” 

 

Stopping cold, Kil turned and stared just a moment before she smiled and slowly pulled herself back in. “Yep...it works.” She said boisterously. “I was um checking to see if I could get out in case of a fire…lo and behold…I fit.” 

 

Ja'far raised an eyebrow at the obvious lie but he chose not to call her out on it. “Ah yes very good however...you mustn't strain yourself you were very badly injured and need your rest “ 

 

Nodding, she made her way back to the bed and stared at him anxiously. “Is there something you needed sir?” 

 

Ja'far shook his head. “Not at all I came to speak with you actually...you see we’re all a little worried.” 

 

As he came to sit by her bedside, he noticed she leaned back slightly, her hand traveling to her neck as though she feared he would strangle her. “Worried about what?” 

 

Ja’far thought for a moment, choosing his words carefully. “Well it's just...you've been very...on guard since you've come here and while I don't blame you it is a bit concerning. Kil...do you think we're trying to hurt you?” 

 

She blinked a moment in surprise before she averted her gaze anxiously. “I...well…I……” she sighed, looking back over at him in defeat. “A little bit...maybe.” 

 

Ja'far frowned a bit. “What are you afraid of exactly?” 

 

Kil gave a half chuckle. “Honestly...everything. “ 

 

Ja'far only nodded. “I understand.” 

 

She stared at him a moment, nearly glaring. “No you don't…you’re not trapped here are you?” 

 

“Kil...you're not trapped here…” Ja'far said softly. He sighed. “We simply brought you here because you were wounded and unconscious…you weren't present for it but...Maader signed all her assets over to this company and all of the Mariadel company's workers were immediately set free. As soon as you've recovered you can go wherever you'd like...we're not forcing you into anything...you're free.” 

 

He was met with an almost bitter stare and she turned away from him. “Yeah well that’s your best joke yet. You wouldn’t help me if I wasn’t being trapped here…” turning back to look at him, she sighed. “Look, I’m not trying to cause trouble. I know you’re just going to use me and I’ve accepted it...just do your worst already...I’m sick of waiting around in fear like this.” 

 

“I already told you Kil, we’re not going to hurt you!” Ja’far exclaimed. “Yes, I know that we lied to Maader, yes I know that hag fucked you up so bad you think no one but her would ever treat you kindly...I know all that and I’m sorry, but you have to believe me when I tell you that we only wish to help you.” 

 

“This has nothing to do with Maader.” Kil lied. “I simply know that truth that no one would help me out of kindness...so just tell me what you want from me.”

 

“That’s what I’m trying to say Kil, we just want you to be happy. We took you in because we refuse to leave someone who’s unable to care for themselves behind and if you want help you need to trust us. I know how you feel...trust me I know how hard it is to adapt to these people...but please just stop turning us away. At the very least, you need to allow yourself sleep and eat something, we’re not going to hurt you.”

 

Sighing then, she nodded. “Alright fine. From now on I’ll listen to you all and do whatever the hell you want even if it makes no sense, happy now?” 

 

Sighing, Ja’far nodded and stood. “Fine then.” He huffed. “Just get some rest or something.”

 

As soon as Ja’far left the room however, Kil stood with a groan and inched her way back to the window. Carefully climbing out then, she took one last look at the company building before turning and walking away. She was happy in that moment, happy that no matter what happened she would never have to stay trapped in that awful place. 

**Author's Note:**

> I needed to write a denial fic for Kil because I love her so very much and also because I need to make myself Kil content as there isn't any otherwise rip. Anyway thanks for reading this and I hope you enjoy it. <3


End file.
